... to update my submissions regularly, SOMETHING happens and I end up having NO time to draw. I was doing really well there for a bit wasn't I? But I guess that is normal for me. If I could JUST get on a schedule, life would be much easier... Alas, my sleep disorders don't always cooperate. Mmm, actually, they normally don't... at least not for very long. I'll have a great week where I will sleep good, wake up on schedule, have energy during the day etc etc, but then I'll suddenly have a night where I can't sleep, or I'll wake up and toss and turn...and then I am back to square one. The longest I've stayed on a schedule for was two months. I was super happy about that. I just wish I could find a way to force myself to permanently stay on a constant routine. I'd accomplish SO much more...
So this leads me to exactly why I randomly vanished from DA, without a word, for the last month and some. I finally got time to write up a journal to update you all. Though, I'm pretty agitated right now due to muscle knots, cramps, a headache and PMS. So if I'm a real b***h in this journal, please don't hold it against me.
I'll start with this. I really am honestly sick of not being able to keep a routine up. My days are consistently ruined. I'm starting to thing that I am a naturally nocturnal person. I tend to get inspired or develop more determination the closer I get to midnight... There is something about the night time that feels so peaceful to me. Being home all day by myself isn't nearly as fulfilling and being awake at night while my husband is asleep. This was the case when I was younger as well. The thing IS that the world doesn't run on a nocturnal schedule, and in order for me to get to appointments, build a business, work with my dad etc etc, I NEED to be awake during the day... But I honestly feel like I am fighting against myself. Like there is a clock inside of me that I can't open the door to. So it is stuck on the wrong time.
I remember a couple of my sleep doctors asking if I felt more inspired during the late night. At the time I didn't. I was so tired from having very little sleep for so many years that I couldn't tell. But I did mention that I had felt that way as a child. Both doctors informed me that there are people in the world that are born with their inner clock being set to night time hours. These people are the ones that work 1-8am shifts, or some even 10pm-6am. Apparently trying to deal with your inner clock is key to good sleep. If your mind is naturally programmed to be awake during a certain period of time, and you fight against it, you tend to lose. That is why there are things like Light Therapy. However, that is more successful in people that have lost connection with their natural clock. The point is to reprogram the brain to correspond with the changes in the human body that happen through out the day.
Now, I'm not saying I don't feel tired at night time. Heck, I look forward to bed-but I still get more "pumped up" in the late hours. I'll sit around all day not having any will to do what I need to do. But come 10:00pm BLOOM, I'm up and doing the dishes, cleaning the kitchen, being more hungry... which is very annoying, wanting to read, draw, chat etc etc. UGH I don't know what I should do.
On another note, I quit Pizza 73. Why you may ask. Well because of three main reasons.
1. It was boring. Waiting on the phone, sitting at the computer screen, unable to entertain yourself between calls... I just... got sick of it. Their interface sucked and made taking orders way more difficult than needed, which didn't help my frustration.
2. Prank calls. Most prank calls happen on the weekend, but that is where the highest traffic flow is. I got sick of being called a whore, a bitch, kids threatening to find me and beat me up blah blah blah. I'm an introverted person. I don't respond well to situations like that. And not because I don't want to, but because I can't. Like, I'll comment back and my voice will be quiet, I'll stutter and shake. EVEN though I feel confident in my reply, my mind and body don't respond to the way I feel. I am assuming this is because of the broken links in my brain from being damaged for so long. Essentially my brain misfires and I can't stop that. So these calls are extremely hard for me to handle.
3. Working for free. My job was commission only, so unless someone ordered something, I was basically working for free. MANY MANY times I took calls from people that just "wanted to check the price" or "ask a question". They would then say "Oh okay. Well I'd like to order closer to dinner, but thanks for answering my question". This means another at home service rep will get their call, and make money even though I served this person first. I cannot tell you how much this pissed me off. I remember there were several times that in one hour I took six calls, and only one of them ordered something. So in that hour I worked, I made like-CENTS. Less than a dollar. That's pathetic. What was the point even? And if you accidentally made an error, even if it was tiny, they would cancel your commission on that order and you'd get nothing. On top of that, most Pizza 73s wouldn't open until 4pm, so I'd take so many calls from people that COULDN'T order because the closest shop was closed, even if there was one 20 minutes away, because it was out of their designated delivery area. So I was essentially working for FREE, and I had enough of it. Their commission rate was ridiculous, just under 2%. You had to bring in thousands of dollars worth of orders a day to make a decent income.
So I'm done with that. The people were nice, and supportive, and understanding about my limitations, but that is because they don't have to pay me unless I get them sales. So my loss is only my loss, and not theirs. I am super grateful for the opportunity and the tiny amount of money I made. It did help. But I found something better, so there was no reason to stay with Pizza 73.
Despite this, I am still determined to pay down my debts, but I have to work with my limits. I'm still working with my dad as he really needs someone in the office. I've only cleaned once for my mom to be honest. With me putting in so much hours for my dad, I really don't think I'll have time, OR energy to clean an extra house. I'm still considering offering Reiki classes. A lot of people are waiting for me to teach it, so I should.
Lastly, I joined Jamberry Nails! <3 You may have heard of it. It is more well known in the U.S than in Canada. Plus those are the ONLY two countries Jamberry is in currently. They haven't moved to other countries yet, but they are working on it.
It probably seems odd that I would join a business based on nails. However, this isn't totally as girly as it sounds. They cater to all kinds of women. You don't need to be a girly girl to pretty up your nails. Why? Because Jamberry sells nail wraps. They are essentially a sticker that clings to your nail (they don't even damage your nails either!). They have over 250+ different designs! My mom was the one that originally hosted a party (a Facebook party) and introduced me to Jamberry. I wasn't interested at first. Nail products are EXPENSIVE. However, as I looked through the patterns BOOM there was camo! Ooooooh babe, I was SOOOOO happy. AND they even had PINK CAMO. How awesome is that? Totally my kind of style. Very tomboy.
So I ordered some wraps to give them a go. Once they were on my fingers, I was shocked out good they looked. Most manicures START at $50 CND. That doesn't include pretty designs, or even simple designs. And they chip. However, I got 16 weeks worth of nail wraps for the price of ONE manicure. These wraps last 2 weeks on your fingers and 6 on your toes. They are so easy, and low maintenance. My mom started harassing me about joining (like she does every home party based business, so I ignored her at first.
My mom used to do my nails all the time when I was a little girl. As I grow older not only was I too tired to continue it, but I always ruined the hard work I had done... I simply gave up. Once in a while I'd pull out my nail polish and with determination, sit at the table and try to apply a really nice color, with my shaky hands, and fail. So when I heard about Jamberry I didn't think it would much different, until I tried them myself. Because they are nail wraps I don't have to fiddle with liquid! Now I am FINALLY able to put something nice on my fingers.
(No, this is not a sales pitch)
If you are curious about Jamberry's products the catalogue is available online. I think that even people from different countries can view it. However only North Americans can currently buy them. Here is my website: CLICKY CLICKY
Oh and PLEASE like my Facebook page guys! It helps me a lot! Please give me a LIKE! <3
This journal is getting REALLY long again, so I'll cut it short-er...
Until next time guys "I'm up, over and gone!"-Sonic the Hedgehog